The two points above in bold: should be solved if you go to Preferences>VST and select “Tape Machine Style” in the Auto Monitoring drop-down.
Second point: I assume you mean to see all plugins of all tracks? Then yes, you have to open the Mix Console. If it’s just for one channel, you have the inspector on the left.
Third point: All midi data is recorded; the additional things that are written when you have write enabled is automation. Maybe feels like an archaic distinction, but nevertheless. They could maybe have a preference to automatically enable write on midi tracks when record is enabled, but that might not be much used by most.
About bussing, how does it work differently in Sonar? Just curious. Been using Cubase more or less exclusively since 1994 so I don’t know much about other DAWs.